First look at the book cover of a thing I’m publishing later this year. Super proud of it and stuff.
Too bad that “Romantic Mode” will never be used…you know…cause of the weird room.
And here I thought having an illegal hot plate made my dorm room cool. Check our how UC Berkeley Freshman Derek Low tricked out his room with iOS apps.

This is what happens when I’m insanely hungry but then remember I hid food in the fridge days before.
No point? Does staying alive not count? Does that other person have some of breathing apparatus that no one is aware of?
You don’t make sense.
(via theblackpearl-)
I still can’t believe something I wrote in 10 minutes blew up this big on the internet without me even knowing it.
A 9 year old boy, who built an elaborate cardboard arcade inside his dad’s used auto part store, is about to have the best day of his life.
(via therealmoki)
I don’t want to live on this planet anymore.
(via collegehumor)
50 Cent Doesn’t Know What a Grapefruit Is.
Here’s a new preview from my standup special Dangerously Delicious. Download/stream the full hour for only $5 on http://azizansari.com.
We love this bit. And Aziz.
I already bought this cause I love the Louis CK paypal model and Aziz equally.









